I've Got a Feeling

Well, 2009 is coming to an end.

It's sure was an eventful one... ... just that the Gossip Girl did not have a chance to document what went on my life... LOL

Sorry for the non update June, maybe i kind of got caught up with the late nights till updating my blog became last on the list =.=

The sudden obsession with LAN gaming *surprisingly* did not really help and i really can't play it too late into the night, or rather for too long or everyone else i see in the street looks like zombies... haha

Watched 2012 and did ponder if the world was to end then, should be just laze around and do what we want, and risk ending up fat and poor like what maxim said.. hahaha which of cos the world wouldn't end then because the bible said so. If people end up giving excuses that it may just be a major catastrophe happening that year, maybe they did not realise the end times signs are already taking place =.=

Do not really want this post to go into that direction actually....
maybe my life is really like a huge joke. Of all people why me? i often wondered. but yet the happenings are not at all unique.. but still this combination is pretty much like The Days of Our Lives...

Just thanking God for His grace... I really wonder what would have happened if I did not find the answer to why we are really on this earth. Though as years passes i realise maturity does not come with age, and our view points do not need to match the world..

I am supposed to get the video up first and i am running out of time so till the next photo update!!

Outing...

On the way back to teach!!



Well... Here are some highlights for these two days!!
Guess what I found just now!!



Hello kitty shoes!!! Really divine just bumped right into it while walking ard bugis waiting for diamond Di :b

I even get to test out iPod nano and submitted a video entry abt love which is going to be on YouTube soon... Lol

Oh man I am like running out of cash for the cab =.=





Hughes wearing the " magic glasses" which I lent him which ha the power to read notes faster... Lol




While listening to weisong laoshi giving songwriting tips...



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Reinventing

Renewing rejuvenate restoring ... Hahaha

Hi guys a push from my faithful blog readers compel me to update here..
While I am in a long train ride after a gruelsome session of nihongo =.= wow my homework is piling!!!!
Strange to blog with the left and right staring at what u are doing... Lol .. Haha thank god for the glossy finish
Well well guess I have been resting forcefully by my body. Knocked up is exactly what I should describe what I experience everyday till the extend during weekends I wun dare to sleep so soundly, ESP when the call time is like 8 am......
It would be considered miraculous to be awake for MPM but I did it!! Haha
And I almost got on the wrong train...
I wished I had an answer for everything in life but some things just dun go as planned.. But if u take a step of faith to do it, u might be immediately be frightened by the thought of what if u din!!
Never wanted to live an ordinary life, or rather, I dun really have a chance to live one...
I have a new student who is a 'hot mama' with 2 sons and she's just 25! Plus she is a freelance manicurist!! Haha just the taitai life I wanted lol but then again things would be completely different now =.= running after 2 toddlers?? *cold sweat*...
Haha how fanatic I was? I have a letter written for my daughter already ... Lol or rather it is actually 3 pages of a handwritten diary.. Think it's cool to let ur child know what really happened in ur life before he/ she conceived.
My to do list for this season kind of consists of packing all my stuff .. Books piled up everywhere in my room since SOT and I realized all corners other than the bed, comp, wardrobe and accessory basket are piling on dust...

Well , here are some photoupdates...





Grace the pretty bride got married on the 12th of Oct!!




Spotted: dfc at busstop opposite cineleisure ... And we are performing on the 9th dec at the GYSB Boomz Concert!!




My cycling outing... We must do it again!!! Lol




Makan at JB ... really delicious!!!




Well jamming with bandse7en and our gig is just next week!!! Here's the thumbnail of the video I can't upload hahaha




Never mind the pose but our reaally seriousss weekly pract on Wednesdays... Lol

Till more ^_^




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ME

Back

Well... Since no one can really guess where my new blog is haha I will update public stuff over... Going cycling though there's haze... See how things go^_^




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Thank you

Thank you to those appearing above... These are the people who made me forget my troubles whenever i spend my time with them...

well, moving on to another blog which is not blogger because i kind of want a blog name without my name in it LOL...

well... i just might update stuff here as well.. so stay tuned ^_^

Bon Voyage

Just sent Mavis off in the morning.. She is like one of the longest surviving colleague in my school next to Huan Cheng and JJ which i see them like for eternity.. especially our 仙姑！ LOL

Well, we were prepared to shed buckets but we kind of spent the last moments laughing our hearts off taking photos with the M&M dispensers that the next minute when she left, we still had our smiles... except for meixin who already burst into tears..
Maybe the fact that she is coming back like soon like next June? Time seems to flash past really quickly and it's almost a year already...

Well, it has been a pretty eventful year.. Still remember when the clock strucked 12 on the 7th, I was at Nicole's wake... It's a pity that I would not be able to rush back on time for her memorial service but really, is what she has done that has left an eternity in our hearts... just like people who walk in and out of our lives.

One Di said that he has just walk out of people's lives just within a snap of a finger, but i beg to differ.
Our memories and emotions can't be erased just like that?! Sometimes memories are so vivid, it just leaves a deep imprint in our hearts... whether good or bad..

I just saved myself of a blog entry recently listening the song that was recommended, i can't help wonder that why people don't see the struggles we have within.. Maybe 'cos if they really see it, they probably would have a total different perspective of us!
Sighs just like the psychologist in NTU said that people are judging you with every photo u upload on the net, I was quite tempted to leave the really wrong camera angle photo taken by DD of me and SD which was really very yanzhong looking, when we were like standing like 2 shoulder arms width away!!

Jesus said,"Let him who is without sin cast the first stone"...
But it would really be much easier to avoid being having the person attempting to take the stone.

Just want to thank Aunt Evon for blessing me just to go for my long awaited holiday.. I wouldn't really count mission trips as a holiday cos we are on tight schedules cos half the time we are like memorising lyrics in foreign language or having the stress of song leading.. and we can't really just switch off the phone and enjoy every moment of it .. i guess the last holiday i really was also at the very same place but this time i believe it's like packed to the brim with many activities! i miss the minced meat with basil leave and chilli padi which is like just S$3 or so!!! I wonder how things have changed 'cos the last time i went there it was 2004 i think =.=

Dad called in time last night to wish me bon voyage.. really miss him loads...

Uncle saying he thought my lingerie entry was literal??!! YANZHONG....=.=
and he mentioned that my blog entries and usually happy??!
Haha maybe cos i choose to look on the brighter side of things.. that doesn't mean i am okay but just that i learn to give weight to words that are spoken by people who genuinely know what's going on and are true friends?

I don't really understand the rational of looking at the blog of someone you don't like cos you are like giving away time which is like part of your life to the person already loll

Uncle, this blog entry blunt enuff liao bo... =.=
F5

Lingerie

Just thought of an analogy..
You have different kinds of lingerie, sometimes cute, natural or even wild..according to your moods but you can't really let the whole world know or see...
Probably just your partner.

Sometimes you slip on your camisole and thought it would be fine to let people see the camisole with a jacket over but boyyy... the wrong person saw it and made it a mountain out of a molehill..

It's trendy nowadays to show your innerwear like camisole, spags with something else over so items like camisole stays in a grey area on whether isit a lingerie in the first place or just like another ordinary attire people wear on the outside.

Isit wrong for you to wear the camisole? No one can really measure it because of the different ammoral values and culture, but to slap a judgement over a person wearing it?

The bible says judge not or you will be judged.

What is the most valuable lesson learnt?
Lingerie is after all lingerie? OR really learn not to judge others lest you will be judged.

The former will still be debatable over the next 1000 yrs in different forms but the latter is for eternal.

I have decided to focus on what's in stored in heaven.

Meanwhile, uniqlo sells really nice cotton short sleeved tops... till the next time when they have nicer camisoles...

Updates

Wellwell sorry blog readers so sorry for not really updating... I am trying put new photo update tools and stuuff on my iPhone .. Doing our LER photoshoot now ^_^ sigh can't join the peeps at the farewell party I hope they will still be there later =.=

Trench buddies

Haha what am I to know about digging trenches right ... But I guess digging one definitely means hard work and someone who really went into the deep with you... Not the kind that dig in a sale at mango though.... But digging deep requires transparency and truth and certainly not everyone would be able to withstand it ... Some times with clues picked up from bits and pieces you can form a jigsaw puzzle ... But sometimes people pick up a piece of corner and simply use their fantasy to picture the whole thing and if their fantasy scale is heavily geared to the dark side, everything seems to be gloomy like the person is wearing shades all the time.
When the whole world resounds a noise, sometimes I would just close my eyes cos I don't trust them anymore.. Using my spirit I cry out to God ... My trench buddy got trapped in the midst of the noise ... People all around are seemingly helping to search for my trench buddy but their noise is just simply a diversion.
During PM these people just pops into my mind..
PK, M & S
A ... I almost broke down in tears ... I thanked them while above all else was playing... Divine huh.. My daddy, my mom and my bro ... T28 flashed past ... No matter what others think or say, we do love God wholeheartedly and we love people fervently if not we wouldn't be in SOT in the first place and we wouldn't be working so hard in our ministries as well...
Well well, this must end in a lighter note .. Thank God for setting me free ... Though this week is a week of backstabs but I praying that God will give me the capacity to love these people though they just happily trample on the things I have tried to build for years...
See what the world is trying to do to you when you want to do something great...it's how misfortunate that one man's meat is another man's misfortune.

When the music fades..

It's coming to an end soon...

While somethings have ended, others are sprouting anew.
Keeping quiet watching my surrounding, my heart's desire renewed.
What's this pursuit that i have sought, when things have come to naught.
I pry open my eyes and i see a wounded soul.
i hid the tears and stories unfold.
Secrets of the past became a new stick to stir the present stories
I can feel the cold hit me.. What's the agenda i ponder.
If that makes you feel better, why the same traits have to come and bother me again.
What's with these TLP...

Blogging on bed

Managed to download a blogger app n I am testing it now... Just wanna say friends are those who genuinely reach out their hands to help when in need... And being candid honest and truthful , not talking behind or infront already..

Divine appointment…

WOW… What are the chances meeting the person going through the exact same thing with you and even the finest details are the same, with the correct music playing in the background when you both stop talking… like erm one in a billion!

It was really a divine meeting chill out coffee session which was totally unplanned for.. and the fact we decided to do it today… I can really see God’s humour in this but really.. we are like shrieking all the way while walking to Gloria’s and high fiving all the way at the traffic light.

It’s like God planted this meeting for us to share and I will be praying for you!!

Sighs… Enjoy life while we can huh.. we have so many things we wish to accomplish and when we are on stage it’s like nothing can stop us ^_^

Well.. we have 2 major differences but still.. jiayou okie..

we will update each other soon… think urs will change like erm.. days??! =.=

and one happy note. i can see WILBUR PAN!!!!!! this fri ^_^ haha can i have the dream like Fionna??? =b

I still have his first album can i like bring it for autograph?!! haha  really liked his role in the “不良校花”

Team 28! The original one.. in 2 weeks time guess we would be parting our ways moving on to the next phase of our lives but i hope we can still stay in contact as much as possible!

My DIs.. Thanks for being there man! Jiayou the both of you okie.. You have my blessings.. LOL and stop hitting me! =.=

haha lurve this nerdy specs day.. and i din realise cons was in joyous perfection! hahaha

till i looked through the emerge website today..

haha our classroom style pic at batam.. i am still trying to upload all the pics on facebook lor… taking me days =.=

U are so pretty gal.. =.= i really dun think stick thin suits you just stay trim and fit and healthy! you have a nice heart and that will make you glow =)

你总爱编织谎言我负责配合表演
所有改变只为了进入你的世界
这情节重复了一百遍
才发现是你的心太野

你划定楚河汉界我不能轻易犯规
所有时间都是先给了你优先权
不自觉爱到不敢冒险
成了你的傀儡一年两年
才看见我有多狼狈

爱到妥协到头来还是无解
绑着你不让你飞
历史不断重演我好累
爱到妥协也无法将故事再重写
你已下最后通牒
我躲在我的世界

你只是害怕一个人睡
我不想再为你掉泪
我了解不会变不再徘徊
开始自己的明天

…seems like most of my students are singing this song.. thanks to HK’s seasonal favourite song.

Miracle

Need a miracle...

anyway for some photo updates

hahaha from team 28

our first day at Qu You Ci Li ^_^ @ 100.3 pretty shiok co hosting for the first time!

Freedom

Guess what you focus on it will happen... Managed to have some soul food (though a movie would make it more complete)

Thurs was a day of waiting at embassy .. it's just a cross i need to carry for as long as i know..

Just have to repeat the same story over and over again whenever i flash the green booklet.. people are intrigued, but the price i pay is =.=

Noticed i can't be bothered with the comments but so are my friends lol.. my more unglam pics are already up on j's blog, and the emerge07 hair is like already on the powerpoint slide all over asia..

think my first twin is having the time of her life now.. she makes everything seems like a fairytale coming true.. of course there are still ups and down but she really pulled through, with God =.= go girl! can never forget the time she stayed over at my place praying for me (though that was the only time=b) kind of like one of my few regrets for making wrong decisions not to keep her by my side...

this song keeps running in my head...

你就直接回頭吧 她在等著你
不要怕我會哭泣 早就在心底
想想你說過的話 其實我們不虛假
那就好吧 其實你對我不差

別對我食之無味 棄之可惜
雖然你還有感覺 但不是愛情
想想你說過的話 其實我們不虛假
那就好了吧 這些夠了呀

我們的愛情是秘密 不能成立
就算我愛你也不能夠說明
她在你身邊逗你開心
我只不過讓你歇斯底里

你就讓我跟著你 一起祕密
我們的事情說好不提起
讓我們 都能夠清晰 你和她是不變的定律

haha.. just emo..

ouch.. swollen eye... again... better catch some rest .. will blog if i can get online tomolo !!

oyasuminasai

SOUL FOOD

I think i really need a break of some sort... i need to catch a movie! chill and just sleep!!!

well, really thank God for the pack of sardines that gathered at a monkey bar watching a monkey perform lol...
Seriously... TF is entertaining throughout the night and the atmosphere just drops when he leaves the table =.=

Starting to feel a bit sad to think that SOT is coming to an end... Though we have endless assignments and i am barely down with my preaching exams and gulp ... my bible reading...

I just thank God for all that He has done in my life and though this period of time I really have no one to turn to but God, but i guess is Him who wired my heart this way to ponder about things in life and what He has set for me to accomplish...

It's really a bittersweet feeling and though i really don't know how all of this is going to turn out, but i trust in Him to show me a way.
I guess i was really upset how the inilah song turned out on friday because i was really touched by the presence of God just worshipping in my bedroom on thursday night.. tears just flooded my cheeks and i really wanted to pull down the same presence on fri morning but i really had to pull the whole team along =.=
I really understand how PK feel when we are not moving with Him.. the frustrations and the fact that being the Levites, the grace and anointing is upon us and we should really have a deeper revelation of the true reason of why we are serving God in ministry and not just go through the motion.

haha the result of SOT

But i still want my soul food.... Pls pray for my visa apps to go on smoothly and i really want to see where God wants to take me to in July..

going expo now..
kitty

PERSPECTIVE

what is the thing that matters most to you?

What others think or say, or really.. just pleasing the one and only VIP .. GOD

It may sound easy but it's hard sometimes cause like what the bible say life and death lies in the tongue. Whatever you confess to yourself and say to others bring life and death, no doubt about it.

Sorry, but mean words with no edification or correction would simply fall to the ground. No one is perfect. I may have a splint in my eye but you may have a plank in yours.

In another 5 weeks SOT will be coming to an end... i guess we gain some but we lose some as well..

There are many unforgettable moments during these 5 months.

During the first 2 weeks i was trying my best to pull myself out of bed and stay awake.. till now my eyes are wide opened but shut at the same time.. haha

I will miss praying and holy laughing with steph and regi.. giving words of knowledge and prophesying!! woohoo~~

my sardine gang who i went out on a few occasions and traveled down town with them. really funny classmates like toilet friend can make your day !

the sot SLs... for sticking it thru thick and thin... haha

my beloved musos.. ALLEMILIE! Robert Sia...

well.. this is a time i got to play the keys finally for p&w.. indeed God works in mysterious ways

and He has a divine time for everything. I understand how team1 feels when you know you have a gift or talent that seems God given, but God has not decided to use it yet..

Like my dream of playing stagea in heaven, I would think that was it.. the end.. until God used me in a bigger way doing what i am doing now.. (though i still think ultimately i will be contented playing stagea in heaven) but right now, it doesn't seem to be the time for it. And God kind of turned my plan B or rather what i never thought of into His plan A ...

It's tough along the way, the moulding process, coming to a point where ur life is under scrutiny, like you are a super being. Being someone whom others perceive so differently as one's true self is never easy. And it's even harder to find friends who truly understand and know or rather, allow you to be who you are.

Since few years ago, my life has taken a direction which i realise i never expect it to be and now moving on those things i have persistently clung on to seems to pale in comparison what God has promised me.

The solution is by constantly depending on GOD!

till then..

Kitty

Time to update!!!

My bad... sorry for not updating..

=.= my eyes are already closing actually and i have yet finish reading my notes for the mcq test tomolo!!!! hahaha
Had a really really looonngg practice today at Jurong West and i think i reached home around 12 plus close to 1am =.=

How have I been... F&N Commercial for DFC is up already!! haha wanted to talk about this long ago but we weren't supposed to say anything till it's on air..
and an angel got me a netbook.. and my advance birthday present ^_^ haha guess he is putting his treasure where his heart is but i just want to say another BIG THANK YOU to BB
Feeling kinda sad actually now that there's only 8 weeks left to SOT..
I am kind of slowly getting used to waking up that early ..though i crawl out of bed sometimes.. and want to head home rather than hanging out and have endless assignments to do..
but i really thank God for His divine time in everything.
I will miss my SOT peeps... Anamalie!!!

Tomorrow's the student gathering... and i have many interesting things to share with them!
Gotta go prepare it now.. meanwhile... check out photo updates on my facebook!

GOD BLESS

Kitty’s latest updates

really really sad cos my laptop is down!!!!!!!

now i really need a new one… was admiring javius’s macbook pro during lesson today.. so cool man!!

Plus a handphone that doesn’t allow calls to come through sometimes is not really that helpful at all!

Today is one of the rare hour that i can just sit here and blog a bit before my next lesson commences.. there seems to be tons of work on hand and i dunno where to begin..

Pst Mike is amazing!!! really need to pray hard for tomolo though.. not sure how many songs i would need to sing till everyone is ministered! gonna be an exciting meeting tomolo… and i hope i can wake up earlier than usual… really no more $$ to waste on cabs… i took a cab to work and then realised that the student has cancelled his lesson yest..=.=

waiting for my free dinner from nana…

thinking of the new xinwang taiwan cafe!! gosh.. i really miss taiwan.. think the under 25s are going for one trip next month.. really miss the action!

there seems like a million things i want to do but i can’t have it at the same time.. i really want a breakthrough!

i prob have more entries if i stop telling myself i have to upload the photos as well too =b

so for photos everyone has to go to facebook i guess..

i started a new chinese blog at www.wretch.cc/blog/estellasia

i will write more abt singing and interesting things that happens in class .. and i am trying very hard to update..

 

God please give me a laptop so i can bring to class and blog more!!

Amen.

Kitty really busy

okie my faithful readers are complaining… sorry for the non updates man… i am still catching up on my readings and my assignment which is going to be due next mon!!!

SOT is really sxciting so far.. but i still learning how to stay awake sometimes =b Enjoy the presence of God though.. He helps to make the trip down boon lay worth it!

anyway.. my photo updates are now shifted to facebook and i will be starting my chinese blog for my students .. mainly puting up videos of them and sharing more stuff abt singing and performances..

till then…

Est @ Mac with  SW and SX